An eleven plus story. One day a mother and her son were working through eleven plus papers. They were sitting peacefully in the foyer of a very large leisure centre. Suddenly a man stopped importantly beside them.
The man was dressed in a pin striped suit. He was carrying a lap top and a bundle of significant looking books and papers. His shoes were polished and his tie was obviously silk. His hair was combed smartly – and there may have been the faintest hint of gel. He spoke to the mother and the child – and without indentifying himself - asked them if they needed any help. “I can see that you are struggling. If I can help you with your problems, will you buy these books from me?”
The mother and her son looked at each other. They nodded simultaneously. They looked down at the paper in front of them and said in chorus, “Done!”
The important man sat down in a chair, opened his lap top, and began surfing. He did not even glance at the papers in front of him on the table. He pulled a little thermal printer out of his briefcase and started printing out a pile of answers. He then glanced swiftly over to the waiting pair and said, “The answer to number 34 is 11.”
Without waiting for their response he started collecting the books he had brought together and began adding up the total price list.
The mother said, “If I can guess your profession, will you let me have all those answers?”
The man said, “Of course. That will be a pleasure.”
The mother and son consulted each other in a staged whisper. Without a smile they chorused: “Deputy Head!”
The man was astonished. “How did you know?”
The mother replied, “First of all you are wearing a badge showing that you have been CRB Checked. Your name is also on the badge.”
The man looked down in surprise. “I thought I had taken my badge off.”
“Yes,” said the son. “Your badge shows that you are the Deputy Head of your school.”