Many bright ten year olds have this rather deceptive self contained air. It is sometimes hard for a parent to maintain that rather delicate balance between wanting to keep offering rules and precepts and on the other hand allowing full voice to an emerging personality and intellect.
We all pray for advancing maturity and greater emotional balance. Your child, however, continues to need praise, reward, criticism and a good dose of warmth and understanding.
There are, however, two sides to the coin. One of the basic tenets that children need to understand is that parents too need praise, reward, criticism and a good dose of warmth and understanding. Sometimes children do need to be reminded of their obligations to their parents.
Some parents have found that the words: `After all I have done for you……’ do not go down too well in the middle of a heated discussion. What you want is to try to find words that will increase motivation and a desire for dialogue.
If you and your child have worked happily together then it is very unlikely that the stress and strain of eleven plus examinations will amount to much. Both of you should be able to take it all in your stride.
As a parent you naturally want to try to continue to develop the will to learn. However much you work together your child may still not pass the examination. Whatever the result of the eleven plus examination the `self contained air’ may slip at times. Then you will feel that you have earned your right to be parent.