Eleven Plus Trees

At a meeting today, in the centre of London, a remarkably helpful person offered some advice on how to cope with stresses of technology. The conversation ranged over a number of topics including how much failure of different forms of devices impacted on our daily lives. Naturally I was a passive listener because the odd problem of some computer not switching on is nothing like the stress faced by eleven plus parents.

“I have a bright child but he is so laid back that he would fall over if gravity did not hold him upright.”

“Oh Dad! Of course I am going to work today. I just don’t feel like it right now.”

“I will do anything but just not maths today. Please? Please?”

There is, apparently, a solution. Plant a tree. The theory is that when there is upset and chaos we need something to hug. Now a mature tree in large tub will cost around £850.00. Paying that should minimise eleven plus stress. But think how you would feel as you hugged the £850.00 tree!

If you decide to go for a little forest of trees – and you don’t want to call the group of trees a hedge -  you may need to pay around £250.00. Paying that off the credit card every month could alter the focus of your stress.

There are little sets of trees – where there are offers on a little apple, a pear and a peach. In the right growing season around £40.00 may secure your calm.

Finally, parents could even `borrow’ a child sitter to be able to walk hand in hand through the local park. Hugging established trees, in the full view of the public, should reduce stress.